Cactus Honey

The desert will always remind me of you.

A rawbone wasteland
that would make any flower daring to exist
into a siren's song.

The drips from every swollen note would, of course,
seduce the thirsty stranger of the sands that I am.

Hallucinations can make a well out of anything
if you're thirsty enough.

And I made an ocean out of you
with the absence of your touch.
So drunken and drowning off
the sunshine petals of your crackerjack
love

you're only in my head.
and we are out of our minds here.

This desolate ground is no friend to the abandoned.

The sun haunts the lonely into the night.
and the blaze of its rays never leaves my bones.

There is nothing, nothing here to make a home.

I do not know how to survive here.
But then
I see you.

Drawing sheets of silver water
glistening from your pockets
a beautiful unfolding escape
that I nearly swallowed whole.

I found you tucked safely
beneath my scabs
beneath my chest
beneath the darkness
beneath this crowded bed.

You hollowed out stones
I made our bed, you (lied) in it
this was our home
this was our home
this was my home

We played love in an empty house
windows left open while we both crept out
spilling into the neon palate sun
(wish you were still here to kiss my scalded palms)

You are gone.
Gone.
I cannot find my way out of this place.

I have spent too long staring at my own reflection
in the gloss of your eyes.

Too long being a fool for beautiful dreams
and silver linings.

Made me believe there was an endless ocean
at the edge of the burning sands
and I followed them to the very end

but the ending
never seemed long enough
for you to miss me
miss me

I kissed sanctuary at your feet
how much I adored you

Mirages built well enough
to fool the sun
into lending its warmth
to phantom skeletons
The well I've created out of you
swallows all of my wishes
but how comforting the illusion
of everlasting arms

How poisonous hope can be
when your cup runs empty.

I have never known a bud
more placid in hue
more unyielding in bloom

You paint kindness on your petals
but deception was the bitter taste
I found in your nectar

It is you who paints the roses red

Such a blind paradise I found in your sword-filled smile.

You were a whirlwind of
what if's and could be's

my cactus Honey,
you have the most beautiful
bad intentions

My prickly pear cactus
armed to the neck with swords.

you were never my well
never my friend
never mine,
my
hope

just a boy

playing with mirrors in the desert.