i am a keeper of things

I remember the old man on the subway. And when everyone moved, I stayed. I kept him and I keep him. And he wasn't old at all. I remember 25/34 and a rose. I kept them and I keep it. I remember the woman in Verona. I gave her my smile instead of some coins and she gave me her with a missing tooth but she knew more than I did. I kept her too. I remember them too, each of them, no labels nothing to hold onto. I keep them. I remember his singing voice stirring and jolting like the wind and water and heat. I remember how they moved too and I stayed. I remember his eyes like the water used to be and he was singing. I keep him and I'll keep him. I remember those twin souls, so beautiful. I remember the dead bird in front of my house. I remember my bird and how he flew away and that's okay. I remember you, yellow eyes full of question and how I turned away. I remember circle, circle, dot, dot, ten bullets in your back! And popcorn kernels and barbeque sauce. I remember the lemonade. I remember how he choked on his own blood and died and I wish I would've held your hand then. I remember how she jumped off the freeway ramp. Free baby bird. I remember foam in the mouth and why'd you have to go and killed yourself in a bathroom. I remember goodmorning tea parties. I, am a keeper of things. I remember those beautiful things. I remember those beautiful faces and those beautiful deeds. I remember my father's santeria remedies. I remember her fierce kindness and how I took it for granted. I remember his treasures, him, golden. I remember meeting my fever on a bench. I remember how he apologized. I remember their secrets. I remember their fear. I remember every scar, every dimple, every curve of bone. I remember how he dreamed in sleep. I remember nose breath and teeth. I remember being a naked mermaid in a sink and I remember where they touched me without asking. I remember and I remember. I remember james and his tears in my hands. I remember seeing a star dip behind the shadows. I remember how he called me joyful and his friend and how much it meant. I remember being one of two choices and sad that I didn't lose. I'll keep her too. I remember twin ladybug souls. I remember headless barbies. I remember beach boy jesus god and dancing like oh that never felt so good and I remember being loved. And I remember being taught to be brave and saving spiders from being drowned in the sink. I remember how he introduced himself as loving me already. and that's so wonderful, really. I remember. And I remember loving you, scared but true. I remember being loved and this, this is for you, everyone. I love you.